theyellowbrickroad:

people who kiss their family members on the mouth are mad weird

Source: theyellowbrickroad via

dulect:

no need to thank me

your credit card will do

Source: dulect via

claphne:

dont use internet humor outside of the internet

no one will laugh

Source: claphne via

jakemalik:

I won’t truly be happy till it rains french fries

Source: hi via

lameborghini:

ever since school started there hasnt been 1 day when i havent been tired

Source: lameborghini via

foodtrucker:

i hate cute couples unless they’re 50% me

Source: foodtrucker via

spinachbabe:

buying clothes that aren’t black is hard

Source: spinachbabe via

i thought i left my ipod in the theater so we went back to look for it and i couldn’t see so i turned on my ipod to give me some light so i could find my ipod do u see where this is going because i did not 

Source: burgrs via

bullied:

90% of the contacts in my phone are useless.

Source: bullied via

spookydeantops:

U HAD SEX

WITHOUT ME?????

Source: twinkdancy via

crystallized-teardrops:

life is all about tough decisions

getting enough sleep or staying on the internet

Source: crystallized-teardrops via

jesusthelastairbender:

mom….gay….

i’m dad 

Source: jesusthelastairbender via

lastgreattimewhore:

if lucifer needs someones consent to enter their body then so do you

Source: cuntthatout via

buttermilkqueen:

dont u dare treat ur animals like shit in front of me i will end ur life son

Source: beeblejuice via

aggybird:

‘hi i haven’t talked to you in five weeks but we’re still best friends’: a story about me and human interaction.

Source: aggybird via
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