Kawaiiiprincess666

lucillesballs:

fun game: go reblog ur favorite selfie of me

baracknobama:

cardio? more like cardino

lindsaylohoean:

i failed at raising a tamagotchi how the fuck am i supposed to raise a child

snapchatting:

i was confident for like 2 minutes one time

pubicles:

Becoming a cold hearted bitch wasn’t really what I planned to do with my life but here I am

friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food
me: can i have some
boys: if ur slutty enough to send a nude pic then u deserve to have it shared everywhere lmao
boys: please send me nudes baby you're so beautiful i just wanna see more of you please baby i thought you loved me

humorking:

my hobbies include looking at text posts and wondering how i didn’t think of them first

dylanohcryin:

nothing fucked me up more than hearing the line “now they’re going to bed and my stomach is sick, and it’s all in my head but she’s touching his chest” in mr brightside and REALIZING THAT SICK AND CHEST DON’T RHYME… ….SH E’S NOT TOUCHIGN HIS CHEST…..

martinseptim:

beats by dr. phil

silversora:

Allergies are weird as heck. You can snap a humans leg in half and they can recover but if you eat this peanut u dead

oomshi:

my phone battery died faster than my dreams

mom: can you do this chore for me?
me: *doesn't do it within 0.2 seconds*
mom: *does it for you*
mom: why can't you ever be responsible

compliment:

do you ever just want to listen to the same song for a week or maybe two